italia journal entry 1

italy was such an amazing experience. i wish i could share everything that happened with everybody, show everyone everything i saw, and express to everyone the feelings i felt. but im not silly, and i know i cant do that. so what i decided to do is share with you some of my journal entries. they may be boring or not make much sense but i means something to me. happy reading!

day 2 7/24

this is not what i was expecting at all. after waiting in the airport for over three hours and the long rickety bus ride to garden valley i was greeted by several people cheering for me. i certainly felt welcomed. though it is so so so hot here and there are several different types of people, we are all here for one reason: you.

god this is the oddest thing i've ever done. i feel like i dont belong here, im such a sinner. i go against your word everyda. lord im tired, ive barely slept the last two days. give me enery. help me be alive in you. my body is full of infection i feel like im withering away but lord you are MY HEALER! heal my body, help it not be a distraction. i dont want to just pray a prayer, i want to dance with you-just you and me. my heart yearns for you. im so lost and broken. change me. consume me. teach me.

lord why am i here?

im uncomfortable and feel so small but i know you have me here for a reason. you're molding me into the person you want me to become. you're asking me to step out of my comfort zone and this is WAY out of it. i've already felt like giving up but i know you want me here. you've provided a way for me to get your, you're with me right now. help me feel your presence, keep my mind off home and focused on you. save me lord. humble my heart.